Once upon a time…. We hear it in old fairytales, classic movies, and the start of a story describing the kind of adventure little girls dream of. It’s the titles of TV shows, books, songs, and more.
Most often, when we hear the phrase, we expect it to be followed by an adventurous and magical story filled with wonder beyond the natural world—one with gallant knights, daring princesses, adoring townsfolk, death-defying battles, and talkative animals. We always see it as something far off in a distant (or more accurately, non-existent) world; in a time long forgotten, because it never was. It’s like “once upon a time” automatically correlates to a long, long time ago, in a land far, far away.
But you know what I think of when I hear “Once Upon a Time”? I think of the passing along of stories that happened in our past. The legacy of one generation to the next. The recalling of memories being relived and shared, as to show glimpses of yourself to the person listening.
Every time I hear “once upon a time”, I view my life as a story. I think about all the stories I have from my life thus far, and all the adventures and thoughts I’ll have in my life to come.
You know the feeling as if you’re imagining your future as a movie? It all happens in sequence, and the characters become the so-imagined perfect person simply by following along. I always imagine the future as being just that, the future. But in all actuality, we never live in the future. No matter the year, or time, or how long you’ve waited for a moment to come, or how many times you’ve planned out different scenarios, the moment you are living in will always be the present. Because by the time you get to tomorrow, it turns into today.
Whenever I think “once upon a time”, I think of the stories not yet told, because they are not yet lived. But the truth is, the now is what is shaping my story. So often we say “when”, but a lot of times, “when” is just another way of saying “not now”. We always see ourselves as growing and chasing our desire (whatever it may be for you, perhaps a hobby, a goal, a person, or a quality, etc.) in the future sense. We envision doing and being all these things, but we leave that to our future selves to make happen. It’s the “I will, but not right now. I’ll let my future self do or be that.” News flash-you will never be the future you, everything you aim to do/be all happens because of one step taken in the present. We continually fool ourselves into thinking that one day we’ll just wake up and be the person we want to be; unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way. Believe me, I’ve tried.
But maybe that’s not so unfortunate. Because what purpose does the story have with only an ending? Then it isn’t really even a story to tell. The conclusion may be desirable, but it loses its meaning and power.
Our “once upon a times” aren’t compromised of our futures, rather, we’re writing them right now as we live our lives.
In a world where writing is a lost art form, actual conversation seems to be a thing of the past, and it seems that abbreviations and tweets have replaced complete thoughts, we fail to hold dear the story. We label stories as fictitious or irrelevant. But the sharing of stories and passing down of memories is not only how we learn to appreciate heritage, but also (and possibly more importantly) how we grow to appreciate where we are now and who is around us in the current moment. And maybe, just maybe, by losing the wonder, curiosity, and adventure of the tale, we have also forgotten what it means to live our own lives. Our world makes it so easy to simply cruise on autopilot and mentally live someone else’s life, instead of experiencing our own.
You see, my friend, we’re writing what will someday be our “once upon a time” right now. As we’re living life, many of us are desperately trying to fill it by escaping to someone else’s world through modern entertainment. (Now, I’m in no way saying entertainment is bad, only that it is imperative to keep it in its proper place.) By doing so, are we losing what is happening right in front of us? In escaping, we’re leaving behind the one life that we do have. Everyone wants to be in the fairytale, but if we just looked around and took a moment to see, we would realize that we are in our own stories now. It’s a story not yet written, a road not yet laid, a book not yet read. We’re living it RIGHT NOW. Our legacies are formed by the choices we make today and how we choose to live our lives in the at this moment. How we work and treat others, how we hope and strive for excellence. I would challenge “What will your story be?”; but it’s more like “What do you want to be able to tell about today?” So tell me, what will the narrative of your “once upon a time” look like? Because the rest of the story starts now.
Much love,
Joy Finn